I’m Not Ready

I got some bad news today.  My grandma is in hospice in their dementia unit with a mild case of pneumonia.  In my mind, I know what this means.  It’s just a matter of time,  My aunt said my grandma has been sleeping a lot and has been a bit unresponsive.  I haven’t seen her in a number of years mainly due to a feud I’ve had with my mom.  I’m wracked with guilt because of this, but I am somewhat comforted by a talk I had with her once where she told me to just worry about living my own life and not to get bogged down about being around the family.  I’m so saddened by this that I can’t fathom what I will feel when I get the final call.  Please keep her in your prayers.  She’s a strong woman whose love I’ve always known, even in the darkest times of my life.

Grandma, I love you.

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